It doesn't come much as a surprise that I became a follower of this podcast, since I am a true blue rusher at heart (I have been to the Top 10 book signing in 2012 and also visited the "kikay barkada" at the station AND I have to mention that my entry was part of The Morning Rush top 10 (book 2) so yes, my fandom comes from way way back). With Delamar officially leaving the Morning Rush in 2016, it was a pleasant surprise for me to discover that she was still active in broadcasting, now in the form of podcasts.

For Monica and Gelli, I didn't know them that much during their radio days, but as I listened to the Eve's Drop podcast, I got to know them better. Monica is the co-owner (together with their husband) of the Sweet X restaurant (also known as Sweet Ecstasy), one of my favorites in the metro (they have the best burgers in town!). For Gelli, we'll, let's say she's just the woman who introduced me to Thetahealing in 2020, which changed my perspective of the world, when I most needed it.

These three women were my anchors during the pandemic and during the culmination of the "dark night of the soul" phase of my life, so I really owe a lot of my values as a woman to these three. 🥰 In a previous post, I mentioned that I really thought long and hard if I should push through with attending the concert or go with the live recording of this podcast. I'll just expound my thought process at the end of this post on how I arrived at my decision.

Once that I have set my decision that I would indeed attend the live recording of The Eve's Drop podcast, I have arranged myself to go to the office on a Friday. The venue of the recording was in The Pod Network in Mandaluyong. The call time for the live recording audience was 5PM. I arrived there just in time. I saw there were a few people in line. The first one I spotted was Jude Rocha, seated in the audience area. Then, I saw familiar faces of the OG rushers. I was able to do some quick small talk with one of them (hi JRhyan!). I was able to befriend the lady beside me (hi Jo!) and we talked a lot for the whole night. 😁

They informed us that they will be recording two podcast episodes that night, so I already prepared myself that I would be staying for the event for hours (no chance really to attend the concert, which was in MOA arena in Pasay 🥲). While waiting, there were several activities for us. Well, the first activity was EATING! Sweet X graciously gave us free burgers (wohoo!) 

The first episode that they recorded was the one with the Boys Night Out hosts. It was already around 8PM when the second episode recording started. As sleepy as I already was (heh coffee didn't have an effect), I was giddy to go inside together with four other people. As I took my seat inside the recording booth, I couldn't help but just be star stuck with all these people in front of me.

Parker, Del's second son, was also there in the room. He was watching the recording alongside us. 🥰

For the second episode, they were to read letters requesting advice from them that the listeners sent in. Initially I had the inkling to send one (regarding my top-of-mind emotional experience) but decided against it because I was already tired of dwelling and ruminating in it. Well, the Universe had other plans. 😂The first letter that they read was in parallel with my current emotional burdens. The similarities were uncanny like it was a letter that I wrote myself. I felt like I shared the same soul with that letter sender. 😢 The only difference that I found was the timeline of the relationship and that there was cheating involved in the relationship (well that also occurred in mine, I'm sure, in more ways than I was aware of).

The advice that these ladies gave to this listener 100% hit the bullet for me, as well. I was bawling my eyes (and nose) out, as silent as possible because I didn't want the mics to catch the sound of me noisily clearing my nose. Just, omg. At that moment, I understood why the Universe wanted me to be there. It was not enough that I listen to this advice in a podcast recording. I needed to hear, feel, and see their energies in real time as they give these nuggets of wisdom, for me to truly receive and process the messages that they were telling us.

 I really could feel that they've been through the same pain, and they have emerged on the other side as a stronger version of themselves, and thus hearing those nuggets of wisdom gave me A LOT of comforting energy that yes, me too, I'll be able to get through this and become stronger in life, just like them. 🥲

At the end of the recording, I realized I was not the only one bawling my heart out. One of the five listeners with me in the room, who took the photos, chatted with me for a bit. She also told me that she was also holding tissues while watching the live recording. 😂 Because of this experience, I got to really witness how universal to human kind the pain of undergoing a heartache from a romantic breakup. While each of us have unique heartbreak stories and experiences, the advice that people can give can be applicable to everyone. I am truly thankful to the Universe that I got to experience this. That night, as I released more of the remaining pain in my heart through the tears in my eyes, my soul got refreshed and got to heal some more.

After the recording was done, we took these photos, thanks to my fellow Eve's gang listener, I got to have a photo with them hahaha. I wouldn't be able to ask for photos from them (with my current emotional state at that time) so really thanks for this, I got to have photos with everyone. 😁

I left the venue that night with my eyes swollen but my heart full. I was 100% sure, with all the signs and validations from the Universe, that my decision was right to attend this live recording over going to that concert.

And so, this was my thought process in deciding where to go between these two events: the concert or the live recording. I felt like these two choices represented choosing my younger self (concert) or choosing my future self (live recording) --to reminisce about the old times with Vanessa Carlton's music or to show up for my future self by meeting the women I look up to.

With the concert of Vanessa Carlton, I recognized that it would fulfill a childhood dream of meeting my idol, someone I longed to see live in concert. As a music enthusiast, it was a big deal for me. However, the things that stopped me from doing that are -- first: I felt like the part of me that loves or longs for Vanessa's music has already faded away. To be frank, Vanessa Carlton's craft of music has changed throughout the years. The fact that she seldom plays her older songs in recent years, which were my favorites, indicates that she has moved on from that kind of music. But since she knew that that's what the crowd wants, she played them for that night's show. But that's not what she currently is. She also has changed and is now singing different songs. It's as if she's also looking at her past self for that concert, and I felt like I didn't want to see that version of Vanessa. I wanted to see her most authentic side, singing songs and enjoying performing on stage at the highest level of happiness and fulfillment possible.

I felt like if I went to the concert, I would just be chasing ghosts from the past. I thought long and hard and came to the conclusion that it's time for me to close that chapter of my life. I love Vanessa; I've been a fan of her music, but seeing her now in concert would not have the same impact on me as it would have been 10 years ago. 

Now, I'm transitioning to the other option, which was going to the live recording. I compared how attending this event would impact me. The hosts of the Eve's Drop podcast are women that are very strong and accomplished in their respective areas, and I know that going to the recording would allow me to experience something that would serve my future self more because I would gain nuggets of wisdom from them (which I actually did. I'm really thankful). Also, attending the podcast recording aligns with my current identity and values. I felt that going to the podcast recording would serve my future self more. Also, the live recording was free of charge. 😂

So I was really glad that I came to that conclusion. I stuck to it, fleshing out the pros and cons. I was glad because when I finally made the decision, I really committed to it. Nothing swayed my feelings anymore. And the Universe echoed back that energy. ✨

This was another core memory for me. Again, thank you, thank you, thank you. 🙏

~o~

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